Twirling, swirling down......

Misled troves on Sunday morning fly away..

I sing as I was the wind

And burn like the fire..

Trembled cold ice lives in my heart.

Racing are my words..

They twine together as one.

But they are living together as two.

Roses that are grey..and oceans no longer blue..

A bridge not to be crossed,

A church not to be kneeled in..

Once at peace, resting 4 eternal bounds,

Only then will I live.

Can you see the clouds up there?

I can.....I can not only see, but I can feel the clouds...As they float, on their journey to somewhere here or somewhere there.....Can we track them down? We THINK we can...but they are free... They can drift away, swim along or even go away... Just like me.. Do you think you know me? Well, yes you do..But you know just how much you don't.... :)

Another day...another morning..it'll pass...everyday...and I'll be happier and more contented to feel that I have YOU..But you'll go away...and I'll again be a part of the journey of the clouds..yet again...

Do you feel the distance encroaching on me? Do you you feel it on us? Do you hear me? Can you answer me??

Streaks of black and white and grey...moving past me...What are they? Disillusioned figures? Obscure waves? Its spinning my world..Hold me...lest I fall.....And then, leave me gently.....

You can see the clouds...But I can feel them up there...I can feel me.....

I do......

"He is my best friend...nobody can replace him"

The words carried on...I kept on listening intently..trying to figure out even that little bit of information that'll again get me back to hope... I did not... Back to square one, am I?

Today morning, was fresh, was new....yet was stale.. I could feel the sense of disappointment engulfing me.. And the reality that cant be taken away...

They talked..I heard them...."it's too early to think about such a lot...Shudnt we be trying out different ones first? Let things come as they come.. Why think of bad things? "

But is it really that far away? I dont think so...Because I'm the one who's leaving...Not you..You left me long ago..And you didnt come back...I waited..and i still am....and I will.....

But dont I know? I do...I had given myself too many chances already..Now no more.....

I move on..from here....I promise..If you dont come back, I will not look back..And things will never be the same again....I promise...

Down There...

Dark days, gloomy nights

Me, am lying, staring,

blankly

At the sky.

The vent, widened,

It screamed

What?? Yea, its me.

I've been to pieces, torn, tormented, bruised.

Shucks! Am I still alive?

I am, for good.

Who are YOU??

What have YOU got to do with ME?

Shite off!! You've got no business here.

I'm psychotic.

That's me. Can you deal with it?

But what's this???

Evrything's turning hazy, clouded, dark.

What's this fluid

filling my red eyes?

Tears!!!!

o Jesus!

I'm falling, weeping. My heart,

its bleeding.

I'm crying. I want to go back..

To my childhood.

No I don't. Why?

Its dark down there.

"Make up your mind, you nutter!"

I screamed, I screamed.

I fell. I can't get up, up........

Shake yourself, come back.

You have no right to cry.

You have no right to seek help.

There's nobody around you, don't you see?

You're there, in the world, its just you.

Don't you see??

You can't feel. You don't have to.

I dont.

But I do.

To cry on your shoulder,

to listen to your heart beat against mine.

I want to feel. I want to love.

But nobody wants.

It hurts sometimes.

Goddamn. I have to be alone.

The black waters down my eyes

have dried off. There's no one in me.

Am I done with?

Yes, I am.

My share is over...Its just me now.

Just me